Beyond Ravana's 10 Heads: 10 Habits Kids Can Learn to Defeat This Dussehra

By Neha Agarwal, Founder of Mummas Learning Company and mum to Reyansh (7) · October 2026 · 9 min read

Two days ago, our kids watched Ravana go up in flames. The crackers popped, the crowd cheered, and for a few minutes every child in the society believed good had won forever.

Then we came home. And by the next morning, someone was shouting over the TV remote, someone refused to share their Dussehra mela toy, and someone said "I didn't do it" when they clearly did.

Here's the thing I keep coming back to, Mummas. Ravana wasn't defeated because he wasn't clever. He was one of the most learned kings in the Ramayana. He was defeated by his habits - his anger, his pride, his greed, his refusal to listen.

That's the lesson I want my son to take from Dussehra. Not "bad guys lose", but "bad habits make even great people lose". And the best part? Habits are something a 5-year-old can actually work on.

So this year, let's go beyond the effigy. Here's what Ravana's 10 heads really stand for, and 10 good habits for kids that help them defeat each one - with a Ramayana story, a real-life example and one small activity for every habit.

What Do Ravana's 10 Heads Represent?

There isn't one "correct" answer, and that's worth telling your child. 

In the Ramayana, Ravana is called Dashanana or Dashagriva - the ten-faced, ten-necked one. Over centuries, families, scholars, and Ram Leela storytellers have interpreted those heads in various ways.

Reading 1: Ten heads full of knowledge. One tradition says the heads stand for Ravana's learning - the four Vedas and six Shastras. He was a great scholar, a skilled veena player and a devoted worshipper of Lord Shiva. This is a powerful thing for kids to hear: Ravana was smart. Being clever wasn't his problem.

Reading 2: Ten heads of bad habits. The interpretation you'll hear most at Dussehra is that each head is a negative tendency we all carry:

Sanskrit	Meaning	How it shows up in kids
Krodha	Anger	Tantrums, hitting, shouting
Ahankara / Mada	Ego, pride	Showing off, "I know everything"
Lobha	Greed	"I want more", grabbing
Matsarya	Jealousy	Comparing, "Why does she get it?"
Swartha	Selfishness	Not sharing, not helping
Moha / Kama	Attachment, craving	"Just five more minutes" on screens
Durbuddhi	Stubbornness, not listening	Ignoring advice, "No!"
Asatya	Lying, tricking	"I didn't do it"
Amanavta	Unkindness, cruelty	Teasing, leaving someone out
Anyaya	Unfairness	Cheating at games, breaking rules

You'll find slightly different lists in different homes and books, and that's fine. At Mummas, we always say many versions of these stories exist, and we celebrate the variety.

The heart of it is the same: Ravana had ten heads' worth of brilliance, and ten heads' worth of habits that undid it. On Dussehra, Rama defeated Ravana. Every day after, our children get to defeat the Ravana-habits in themselves.

A gentle note before we start: please don't call your child "Ravana" when they're misbehaving. The goal is for them to see the habit as the enemy, not themselves. "Uh-oh, the anger head is showing up" works far better than "You're being a demon." Kids who feel labelled stop trying; kids who feel like heroes fighting a villain keep going.

10 Ravana Habits Kids Can Defeat (And the Good Habits to Build Instead)

Each habit below follows the same pattern: the Ravana head, the moment from the Ramayana that shows it, what it looks like at home, and one small thing to try this week.

1. Defeat Anger - Build the Habit of Pausing

From the Ramayana: When Hanuman was captured in Lanka, Ravana flew into a rage and wanted him killed. Even after being told it was wrong to harm a messenger, he ordered Hanuman's tail set on fire. That one angry decision helped burn his own golden city.

At home: a block tower knocked over, a sibling who "started it", a screen switched off mid-episode.

Try this: Teach "name it to tame it" - a phrase from psychiatrist Dr Dan Siegel's work on children's emotions. When anger rises, your child says "I'm feeling angry" out loud, then takes five slow "Ravana-blowing" breaths, like blowing out the fire on Hanuman's tail. Naming a feeling is often the first step to calming it, and it's one of the simplest anger management for kids tools you can practise together.

2. Defeat Pride - Build the Habit of Humility

From the Ramayana: Ravana laughed at Rama's army. They were "just monkeys and bears" to him. He never imagined Hanuman could cross the ocean, or that the vanaras could build a bridge. His pride made him blind.

At home: "I already know that", refusing help, making fun of a younger cousin who can't do something yet.

Try this: A "Teach Me Something" day. Your child has to learn one thing from someone younger or someone they usually ignore - the house help, a grandparent, a little cousin. At dinner, they share what they learned.

3. Defeat Greed - Build the Habit of Sharing

From the Ramayana: Lanka and the flying Pushpaka Vimana originally belonged to Kubera, Ravana's half-brother. Ravana took both. He always wanted more - more land, more power, and finally, someone else's wife.

At home: "Mine!", hoarding sweets, wanting every toy at the Dussehra mela.

Try this: Before Diwali, ask your child to pick three toys or books in good condition to give away. Let them hand it over themselves. Our Maa Laxmi photo frame carries a line we love for this: the joy of giving stays longer than the joy of getting.

4. Defeat Jealousy - Build the Habit of Celebrating Others

From the Ramayana: Ravana's sister Shurpanakha was consumed by jealousy and comparison, and her actions set the whole war in motion. We wrote a full storybook on it -Jealousy & Comparison: The Story of Shurpanakha - because comparison is something almost every child struggles with.

At home: "Why did she get a bigger piece?", sulking when a friend wins.

Try this: The "compliment chain". At dinner, each person says one thing someone else did well today. Kids who practise noticing others' wins find it much easier to be happy for them.

5. Defeat Selfishness - Build the Habit of Teamwork

From the Ramayana: Ravana fought for himself. Rama won with a team - Lakshmana, Hanuman, Sugriva, Jambavan, Vibhishana and thousands of vanaras building Ram Setu stone by stone. In the much-loved folk telling, even a tiny squirrel helped by rolling in sand and shaking it onto the bridge.

At home: "Not my job", leaving the toy clean-up to a sibling.

Try this: A family "Ram Setu" - one shared job (cleaning a room, laying the Diwali rangoli) where everyone, even the toddler, has a part. Our Ram Sethu – Team Work book has drawing activities built around exactly this idea.

6. Defeat "I Want It Now" - Build the Habit of Self-Control

From the Ramayana: Ravana couldn't let go of what he wanted, even when holding on would cost him everything. Wise people begged him to return Sita. He simply couldn't stop wanting.

At home: "Just one more episode", meltdowns at the checkout counter.

Try this: Let your child set their own screen timer and be the one to switch it off. Praise the switching off, not the watching. Small, repeated acts of stopping are how self-control grows.

7. Defeat Not Listening - Build the Habit of Listening to Good Advice

From the Ramayana: Ravana was warned again and again. His wife Mandodari warned him. His brother Vibhishana advised him to return Sita and make peace. Ravana insulted Vibhishana and threw him out - and Vibhishana went to Rama's side.

At home: the cycle of "I told you three times", or ignoring a teacher's correction.

Try this: Play "Vibhishana Says" - a gentle twist on Simon Says where your child has to listen carefully before acting. Afterwards, talk about one time this week someone gave them good advice.

8. Defeat Lying - Build the Habit of Honesty

From the Ramayana: Ravana sent Maricha disguised as a golden deer, then came to Sita dressed as a holy man. His whole plan was built on tricking people. Rama, on the other hand, went to the forest for 14 years to keep his father's promise.

At home: "I didn't do it", "I already brushed" (when they didn't).

Try this: Make honesty safe. When your child admits something, thank them for telling the truth before you address the mistake. Children lie less when the truth doesn't always lead to trouble. Our Lord Ram "Keep Your Promises" frame from the god photo frames for kids room collection is a quiet daily reminder.

9. Defeat Unkindness - Build the Habit of Kindness

From the Ramayana: Ravana treated people as things to use. Rama treated everyone with respect - the boatman Kevat, the vulture Jatayu whom he honoured like a father, and Shabari, whose berries he gratefully ate in the beloved retelling.

At home: teasing, leaving a classmate out of the game.

Try this: A "Shabari jar". Every time your child does something kind without being asked, a berry (a bead or a sticker) goes in the jar. Full jar, family treat.

10. Defeat Unfairness - Build the Habit of Playing Fair

From the Ramayana: Ravana took Sita when Rama and Lakshmana were away - the opposite of a fair fight. And in the battle, when Ravana lost his chariot and weapons, Rama didn't strike. He told Ravana to go home, rest, and come back the next day. That's how a true hero wins.

At home: changing the rules mid-game, cheating at Ludo, "that doesn't count!"

Try this: Family game night where the rule is "winner helps the loser pack up". It teaches kids that how you play matters more than who wins.

The Dussehra-to-Diwali "Defeat Ravana" Challenge

In the story, Diwali is when Rama comes home to Ayodhya after defeating Ravana. So the days between the two festivals are the perfect time to turn these 10 habits into a family game.

1. Make your own Ravana. Draw a big Ravana on chart paper with 10 heads. Write one bad habit on each head with your child.
2. Pick one head a week (or a day, for older kids). Don't try all ten at once. Start with the one that shows up most in your home.
3. Defeat it with good habits. Every time your child does the good habit - pauses instead of hitting, shares without being asked - they stick a small diya or star on that head.
4. Cover the head, conquer the habit. When a head is covered in diyas, it's "defeated". Celebrate it.
5. Light up on Diwali. On Diwali night, count the defeated heads together and light one real diya for each.

Be patient with the timeline. The popular idea that a habit forms in 21 days isn't backed by research. In a well-known UCL study, adults took a median of 66 days to make a new behaviour automatic, with a range of 18 to 254 days (UCL, 2009). The same study found that missing one day didn't derail the habit. So if your child loses their temper on day 12, that head isn't "back" - just keep going. Diwali is a milestone, not a finish line.

Which habits to start with, by age

Age	Start with	How to teach it
3–5 years	Anger, sharing, kindness (pick 2–3)	Short stories, pictures, praise in the moment
5–8 years	All 10, one at a time	Stories + the Ravana chart + a one-question chat after
9–12 years	Pride, jealousy, honesty, listening	Journaling: "Which head did I fight today?"

For little ones, a story does more than a lecture ever will. That's why every Mummas book ends with one question - like "How do you think Vibhishana felt?" - that turns a story into a real conversation.

Ramayana Stories for Kids to Keep the Lessons Going

If you want the Dussehra story to stay alive well past the festival, these are the books we reach for:

• The Story of Dussehra and Diwali - why we burn Ravana and light diyas, with 5 activities. Ages up to 8.
• Ram Sethu – Team Work - habit #5 in book form, with drawing activities and games.
• Jealousy & Comparison: The Story of Shurpanakha - habit #4, with moral lessons and activities.
• Ramayana Story Books – Set of 3 - comprehension and creative activities for 5+ years.
• Hanuman and the Mountain of Hope - courage and never giving up, ages 3–7.
• Lord Ram Hamper - a ready-made Diwali gift for a child who's just discovered the Ramayana.

Browse the full Dussehra & Diwali collection or all our Ramayana story books for kids. And if your child is curious about what came next, read our post on what happened after Rama defeated Ravana.

FAQs

1. What do Ravana's 10 heads represent?

There are two popular readings. One says they represent his vast knowledge of the four Vedas and six Shastras. The more common Dussehra interpretation is that they stand for ten negative tendencies - anger, pride, greed, jealousy, selfishness, craving, stubbornness, lying, cruelty and injustice.

2. How do I explain Ravana's 10 heads to a young child?

Keep it simple: "Ravana was very clever, but he had ten bad habits, and those habits made him lose. Rama won because he was kind, honest and fair." Then pick one habit your child recognises in their own day.

3. What are 10 good habits for kids to learn from the Ramayana?

Pausing when angry, humility, sharing, celebrating others, teamwork, self-control, listening to good advice, honesty, kindness and playing fair - each one the opposite of a Ravana head.

4. How long does it take a child to build a good habit?

There's no fixed number. The best-known study, on adults, found a median of 66 days, with a wide range. Consistency matters more than perfection, and an occasional slip doesn't undo progress.

5. Is the Ravan Dahan scary for young kids?

The loud crackers and fire can frighten some toddlers. Watching from a distance, using ear protection and telling the story beforehand helps. For very young children, a paper Ravana at home can be a calmer way to join in.

6. What is the moral of the Dussehra story for kids?

That good wins over evil - and more importantly, that even very powerful, clever people can lose because of their bad habits. Being good is something we practise every day.

Sources and Further Reading

• Valmiki Ramayana - Sundara Kanda (Hanuman in Lanka) and Yuddha Kanda (Vibhishana's advice; Rama sparing the weaponless Ravana)
• Lally, P. et al. (2010). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. European Journal of Social Psychology, 40, 998–1009 - summary via UCL News and BPS Research Digest
• Siegel, D. J. & Payne Bryson, T. The Whole-Brain Child - source of the "name it to tame it" approach
• Dussehra 2026 date: Drik Panchang

About the Author

Neha Agarwal is the founder of Mummas Learning Company, India's first spiritual store for kids, based in Gurugram. Mummas began as a Facebook community of thousands of Indian mothers and today serves over 10,000 families. Every book is shaped by that community's feedback and tested by Neha's son Reyansh (8), the company's Chief Product Testing Officer, who rejects anything boring or preachy.

Mummas shares simplified mythological tales focused on universal values, not religious instruction. Many versions of these stories exist, and we celebrate the variety.

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